We all love the days when we travel as packs across a college campus or through the streets of New York. People cut you off, walk against the steady stream of everyone else, texting and walking, or they just happen to be in their own little world. Sounds like…driving? I thought so, too.
Stop. For the people who believe the world lives to serve them (because we all feel this way. Don't lie to yourself) stop and think of walking like driving. The same rules should apply. 1. Walk in two lanes. One going this direction and the other in the opposite. Sounds easy enough. 2. Be aware of other walkers. Not the dead ones (although don't let those bite you), but the ones who don't like being cut off or slowed down because you can't multitask and walk and talk at the same time. 3. NO motorcycle packs allowed! DO NOT walk as a crowd and take up the whole walkway! I don't care how gangster you think you are. I have you beat.
Quit It. 1. You know those little annoying things that people do when they walk, like texting? Of course you do it too, but you're better at it so its justifiable. Well, you're wrong. You are just as bad. Come on, fellow walkers, don't turn into hypocrites. What also falls under annoying walker habits? 2. Stutter stepping. Down with the awkward moments (really, just take someone out. You would rather be a jerk than an awkward loser. Trust me.) 3. Rapping. Just an FYI, if you aren't actually the one rapping in that mad beat you're listening to, you sound awful. That's why no one will give you that record deal. 4. Brake checking. Seriously, the next person who randomly stops/bends over in front of me is getting tackled. (Oh, sorry, I think you're taillight went out.)
Yes, you! I know you may feel bad because this blog post is directed at you (Yes, you!) and don't deny it because I know. I'm watching you. I got eyes in the back of my head. (Gee, what a creeper.) No, not really. I know you do it, because I do it. Everyone does it. Everyone does it because the human mind cannot go beyond the beholder unless we actually think about doing it. Congratulations, you just passed Human Traffic 101.
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